1.) "I want to communicate these things but I feel the split is widening, or closing, I don't know which. The chasm is opening and closing and these words are the borderline. I can stay as I have with bare narrative, but it's getting too difficult, too artificial. It always has been. Let me say that Eben means rock, and rock is never as strong as water. Let me say that the clouds will come and go but that the sky is always there, always blue to the observer, silently mourning. Let me say that when the sun sets the frogs start their croaking and I sit to meditate. When the wind blows through the pines I pine. In everything, this is a stumbling. The previous stress is the disintegration of the disintegration of the world we pretend to not be so.
If there's only one prayer tonight, if there's only one bed, make it so that remembrance blesses the tongue.
Make it lick the letters already written.
written in stone
whittled by water."
from tunnels and bells, sent June 05 2006 from I believe Sri Lanka
10 comments:
check it out. we had long phone conversations almost exactly one year apart.
(from my blog, dec. 14th 2006:)
"so. last night i spent the good part of three hours on the telephone having this twisting tornado of a conversation with eben. a lot of this conversation seemed to revolve around the ways in which we change, in which we ebb and flow...
(an aside - last tuesday eb was introduced to a girl named flo. it made my night)"
(remember joanna newsom concert?. i listened to bits and pieces in my headphones last night, felt good)
wait...you're listening to the concert or to the studio album?...
also i don't remember a woman named flo. i have since met a man named flo.
do you recall last year's call?
you too, sifting through old words? i don't remember the conversation that well, but i remember it was a good one, one that took many interesting and unexpected turns. a lot about death, according to my blog, but also about every-day-dying of ourselves, and what remains of us when everything changes...
do you remember more?
My journtastic book mentions that we discussed callings and manifestations, which I remember as I walked back and forth in my parents' laundry room. but i don't remember what else.
Yes, reading those emails from travel. Charting out my writing as I wrote.
Funny you remember death, which was so important to you at that time, and I remember callings and manifestations, which was so important to me at that time.
If I were cynical, I would ask whether we were conversing with each other or with one's self. If I was first cynical then only appeared to be so, I would ask if that's really such an issue.
i don't think it matters. in fact, i think that's what friends are for, because even though i remember one thing and you remember another, we probably both gave insight (or out-sight?) to the other, maybe just because it wasn't so close to us at the time. it's terribly good to carry water and chop wood. or something.
also, it's funny because i remember where i was during that conversation too. i spent most of it sitting in my dark bedroom. was i asleep when you called? was the power out? why was it dark? or was it just dark INSIDE ME? (dum dum dummmmm) hmmm...
well, anyways, it's funny how clear that all seems. a year ago.
wait, weren't we in the dark because we talked about how you could immerse yourself more into the conversation when you cut out the visual? i was in the laundry room at my parent's house, i think it might've been dark too.
ha, i don't remember that, sounds like one of YER crazy new-agey ideas.
har har, i'm excited to see you.
wait - maybe i remember now. i think i was getting distracted by funny things in my room. probably they were shiny. and then i turned out the light.
"crazy new-agey ideas"
"i'm excited to see you"
too bad you're excited to see me. I think that we'll have to leave the lights off. I can "feel" a person's "field" better that way.
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